Routines

Written by Megan Farcas, LMHC CMHIMP (Clinical Supervisor, Senior Clinician)

During the past year and a half of pandemic life, we’ve all developed new routines—or a lack thereof. Recently a common topic coming up in many conversations (both with clients and in personal relationships) is how to adjust routines now that life is 'opening up' more. 

Some people are struggling with the reality of adjusting the routines they have grown used to over the past year and a half. Maybe it’s remembering how much time you need in the morning to get ready and commute to the office to resume working in person. Or perhaps it’s finding time to be able to go back to your favorite gym now that it is open again. For others it can be a new routine of leaving the house, after many months of cautiously staying home due to understandable concern of the virus. 

In all of these conversations I’m having there is another common thread—trying to identify "healthy routines." We are realizing as we are coming out of pandemic life that there may be new routines we need to create and some we need to leave behind.

For human beings, routines can be extremely beneficial. They allow us to take care of tasks and to do’s in a planned and thoughtful manner. They can create time for physical wellbeing such as exercise or preparing a meal. Even more than this, studies at the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine have shown that individuals who have daily routines can help alleviate symptoms of bipolar disorder, especially when that routine includes consistent sleeping and eating patterns. 

Many of us know the benefit of routines, yet we can often feel stuck in identifying how to create new ones that will be helpful and healthy. Below are some ideas to help you think through ways you can begin to build routines:

Start Small: Pick a small routine that you can begin to change or create. Maybe you want to drink more water throughout the day to avoid the dreaded mid day headache, so your goal is to drink a glass of water with breakfast. Maybe you would like to read more so you begin by reading a couple pages while you wait for dinner to cook. Perhaps you’d like to go back to the instrument you used to play, so you build in a 10 minute jam session after you brush your teeth. Smaller changes to routines are easier to sustain and build on.

Stack Your Habits: As described above, you can begin to build routines by adding to what you already do every day (eating, drinking, brushing teeth, etc).

Try To Identify Enjoyable Routines: Certainly there are "adulting" routines that we all need to have, but it is also valuable to identify routines that bring you joy (music, hobbies, nature, reading, social time, etc). This can be a great boost to your mental health. 

Missing A Day Is Okay: Many of us get sucked into "all or nothing" thinking, so if we miss a day of our routine we can then perpetuate that experience and feel like it is pointless to try to resume what we were working on. Being aware of this tendency and showing grace to yourself when you don’t stick to your routine is important. Tell yourself it’s ok and then try to resume, starting small again if you have to.

Why I Make My Bed Every Day

Written by Megan Farcas, LMHC CMHIMP (Clinical Supervisor, Senior Clinician)

When I was a kid, it was hit or miss whether or not I would make my bed. Oftentimes the driving force behind a made bed was my parents' reminding. This was in turn sometimes met with a sarcastic comment, “Why, I’ll just get in it again?!" Into my teenage years, I started to make my bed more often because I liked the aesthetic. While working over the summer cleaning houses, one of my responsibilities was to make the beds and to make them look like a swanky hotel. I liked the look and started to replicate it at home. By time I made it to college, making the bed was essential. Space in my dorm room was all the space I had to study, hang out with people, and grab an occasional meal.

Since then, through the ever-busyness of life, I began to realize how this simple task impacted me. It was more than the aesthetic; it was the sense of feeling unfrazzled, unrushed, and productive. I realized that, in the mornings when I took a few minutes to make my bed, I felt more grounded, more prepared with a sense of determination for the day ahead.  Its a way to signal to myself that the night is over (no matter how tired I may still be!) and that a new day is beginning. It gives me a moment to pause, to create order, to refresh. Sometimes while I make the bed I find myself becoming aware that I’m unconsciously giving myself a little pep talk for the day ahead. Preparing for potential stressors, reminding myself that I can handle things even if they are messy, just as I am tidying up this messy bed.

In 2014, Admiral William H. McRaven gave a commencement speech at the University of Texas at Austin which went viral with millions of views. It contained the premise, "If you want to make a difference in the world, start by making your bed." The thrust of his speech: taking small steps and accomplishing small tasks leads to a sense of pride, helping you work towards another task and another and another. In the end, you realize that small habits matter as they support larger habits. Similarly, in his book, The Power of Habit, Charles Duhigg notes that making your bed every day becomes a habit that can lead to further positive decisions over the day and a determined sense of taking charge. Over time these habits instill a confidence in taking charge that leads to a stronger skillset in tackling other important habits. 

So, do you make your bed? Can you spare a few minutes to orient yourself with a sense of pride and productivity? 

Now to be clear: this doesn’t necessarily mean that your bed is made perfectly. There are plenty of days mine is thrown together quickly before I'm on to the next thing. Nor is there any magic to this. Just because I make my bed doesn’t mean I am able to successfully accomplish everything in the day ahead. There are days when I make my bed with a real sense of motivation only to have the day end feeling unproductive with many tasks left undone. But on those days I still have an inviting, intentionally made bed to climb into to close out the day and prepare for the next one.